And just have a reality check that where my time was going was not accurately reflecting, not only my priorities and values, but also my desires. Look at what I knew was a priority for me and where my time was going in comparison to that. Something about this miscarriage just really made me look at my life. And then something about this most recent miscarriage, even though it was not as traumatic as other ones I've had, it changed me again and was a really big priority reset for me. And then that one changed me then having Kelly changed me.
That was an evolutionary event for me, that changed who I am at the core of my being. When I look back at the last couple of years, we had our very first miscarriage in January of 2019. But we had my sixth miscarriage in February and that devastated me more than I expected it to, like I said, I thought I had been keeping the emotions contained, but I guess I wasn't, I didn't realize how excited I was to be pregnant again, to make Kelly a big sister to grow our family.Īnd so when we had that early miscarriage, it just like rocked my foundations a bit more than I would've expected. It was actually my sixth miscarriage, which I have not shared this anywhere yet. And I thought I was doing an okay job of that, but it turns out I didn't, because we did have a miscarriage. And as someone who's had recurrent miscarriages, I am very familiar with the goal of finding hopeful optimism without putting too much emotional stock into it, because you never know what's gonna happen. So we decided to do that in, and then my very first month off of the pill, we got pregnant. So we had no idea what have no idea what it's going to take to grow our family, but we wanted to start the journey. We had a lot of miscarriages before we had Kelly. It was around this time that I started realizing this and starting to process what this would mean and what changes needed to happen, that Johnny and I decided we were ready to grow our family. I was not necessarily thinking I was going to step away from the job, but I was just realizing that something was misaligned and I was trying to figure out what that was. And I wasn't quite sure if I just needed to take more time off or improve my emotional boundaries. But between being a parent and the emotional mental burden of a full-time job with very real, stressful responsibilities, impactful, important decisions being made, it just started to feel like a lot.Īnd so at the beginning of this year, it was just feeling heavy. And so being in leadership really always stretched me in that way, which I think was good. I think it was just a compounding effect of having a really emotionally draining job, which is nothing against the company or the job just for me, I'm a Pisces, I'm sensitive. I don't really know what triggered it, but all of the sudden I was just burned out and it wasn't like there's a ton of dramatic stuff happening. But in the very beginning of 2022, that all came to a head for me. I felt like I had been doing a pretty good job of emotional boundaries and keeping that contained. There's a lot of emotional burden and mental burden outside of just the actual responsibilities of the work. And by the end of last year, I realized I was in this place where this was a big job, a lot of responsibilities.
I WANT TO QUIT MY JOB BUT I LIKE MY COWORKERS FULL
So we eventually transitioned to full time. And so I found myself wanting more and more. This job is exactly what I needed.Īnd I actually started out part-time, which was perfect, but I am a workaholic by nature and I've always gotten a lot of fulfillment and satisfaction and personal self worth through work. Like I said, I was really enjoying this job when I had Kelly and I was ready for a little bit more structure and I wanted to have better boundaries. What's next and share a little bit more of how we got here. So in this video, I'm gonna share a little bit more about what that means. After a year, the job was just no longer what was best for me and my family. We're all still on really great terms, but ultimately. And it was a very high level job working with the CEO and other leaders in the company to help make strategic decisions, both for the business, as well as improving the lives of the team members.Īnd I really loved the job. So I actually took a job as vice president of operations for a online digital marketing company, all remote, managing 10 to 20 employees, depending on the time of year. I was no longer in a place where serving a ton of clients in a high ticket group program made sense for what my life was looking like, so I needed to step away. I wanted to step away from the stress of being a business owner. Over a year ago, last January in 2021, I had my daughter Kelly and a lot changed for me. Why I left my business for a full-time job in 2021 in the first place
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